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Was My Ex a Narcissist? Take the Quiz and Find Out!

Curious if he was a narcissist? Try this narcissistic partner quiz and find out!

Editorial: Review CompletedCreated By: Kyler SmithUpdated Aug 23, 2025
2-5mins
Profiles
Paper art illustration for a narcissism test quiz on a coral background

This free quiz helps you figure out if your ex showed narcissist traits by rating real-life scenarios and spotting repeated patterns. You'll get a clear summary to help you make sense of the red flags. For more context, try our quiz on whether you're dating a narcissist or quiz about your current partner.

When you shared a personal win, what response felt most typical from your ex?
They redirected the conversation to their own achievements
They questioned details until you doubted it was a real win
They celebrated loudly at first, then cooled off or withdrew soon after
They were pleased for you but not especially expressive, which felt fine overall
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How did your ex handle planning important dates like birthdays or anniversaries?
Made it a showcase about them, your needs felt secondary
Insisted you miscommunicated plans when they dropped the ball
Grand gestures some years, near indifference or vanishing the next
Tried but sometimes missed the mark; effort was present, just uneven fit
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In group settings, how did their behavior affect you?
They monopolized attention and you became their audience
They later claimed you embarrassed them when you hadn't
They were alternately affectionate and distant depending on the crowd
They were polite but your social styles just didn't align
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When you set a boundary, what pattern followed?
They took offense and reframed it as you rejecting them
They said you never actually set that boundary and you were being dramatic
They respected it for a bit, then drifted back until you protested again
They tried to understand, even if it sometimes clashed with their habits
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How did apologies typically land in your relationship?
Rare, performative, or pivoted to how hard things were for them
Conditional and confusing, with facts disputed mid-apology
Sincere after a blow-up, but followed by repeats of the same issue
Imperfect but earnest, reflecting different conflict styles more than ill intent
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During a crisis you faced, what best describes their support?
They centered themselves and how your crisis impacted their image
They later insisted the crisis wasn't as bad as you claimed
They rushed in with intense care, then disappeared when it got mundane
They helped in practical ways but emotional tone sometimes missed
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How did they respond to feedback about hurting your feelings?
They argued you were oversensitive and shifted focus to their reputation
They claimed it never happened or your memory was flawed
They acknowledged it tearfully once, then cycled back later
They listened, tried, but your styles didn't fully harmonize
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What was typical after an especially loving or intimate moment?
They subtly fished for praise about how great they were
They later claimed you misread the moment and it wasn't that intimate
A sudden drop-off in warmth left you craving the next high
A steady baseline of connection without dramatic swings
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When discussing shared decisions, how did priorities shake out?
Their preferences dominated and yours were minimized
They insisted you were the one who wanted it their way all along
They were all-in on planning, then disengaged midway for unclear reasons
Both tried to compromise, but goals weren't aligned long term
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Social media presence and attention looked like this:
Posts angled to spotlight them, your role was a prop
They claimed a critical comment you remember posting never existed
Over-the-top public affection early, then ghosted acknowledgments later
Low-drama, mismatched posting habits but not hostile
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Gift-giving patterns most resembled:
Gifts that drew admiration to them or came with strings
Denying they ever promised gifts you clearly recall
Lavish surprises at first, then forgetfulness or coolness later
Practical gifts that sometimes missed your tastes
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How were your friendships treated?
They resented attention not on them and needed constant reassurance
They claimed friends were a bad influence without clear reasons, rewriting events
They were affectionate with friends when it suited them, distant otherwise
They respected your circle, even if they didn't fully click
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Responses to your successes at work or school tended to be:
Jealous or competitive, spotlight back on them
They later insisted you exaggerated the accomplishment
Euphoric pride sometimes, muted or dismissive others
Supportive but not effusive; different enthusiasm levels than yours
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When disagreements arose over what was said last week, what happened?
They framed your memory as self-centered and made it about their hurt
They confidently recounted a version that erased your recollection
They agreed in the moment, then contradicted it days later
You both remembered differently, with no intent to distort
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How did they introduce you to others?
As an accessory to their image or status
Descriptions that made you question what relationship you were in
Effusively at first, then downplayed the relationship later
Accurately but without much flourish
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When you were ill or exhausted, the typical response was:
Annoyance that your needs cut into their plans
Telling you it wasn't that bad and you were overreacting
Intense caretaking once, then little follow-through later
Helping within their capacity, even if comfort styles clashed
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Money and generosity tended to look like:
Spending that bought admiration or leverage
Claims they never agreed to shared costs you remember discussing
Extravagant dates early on, then sudden frugality without context
Reasonable budgeting differences and preferences
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Their reaction to you receiving outside praise was usually:
Irritation or one-upmanship
Insisting the praise was for something that didn't happen
Cheering loudly sometimes, barely noticing other times
Happy for you but not wired for big celebrations
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How did conversations about the future usually feel?
Future plans often highlighted how you would support their dreams
They later insisted those plans were your idea or never discussed
Big promises emerged early, then timelines slipped or vanished
Realistic talks revealed mismatched goals more than bad intent
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Your emotional safety with them can best be summarized as:
You protected their ego at the cost of your truth
You questioned your sanity after many conversations
Safe some days, destabilizing others without clear reason
Generally safe but not deeply attuned to your nuances
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Therapy or self-reflection conversations went like this:
They treated it as a stage to show how evolved they were
They claimed your therapist would agree with them if they heard the facts
They were all-in for a bit, then uninterested when change got slow
They engaged unevenly but without manipulative undertones
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Gaslighting is just harmless teasing.
True
False
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Love-bombing can feel intoxicating at first.
True
False
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Wanting attention from a partner is the same as narcissism.
True
False
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Future faking includes big promises that never happen.
True
False
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Every disagreement means someone is manipulative.
True
False
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A partner who revises past conversations can make you doubt yourself.
True
False
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Inconsistent affection is a stable foundation for a relationship.
True
False
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Compatibility differences can cause conflict without malice.
True
False
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Memory gaps during arguments prove you are at fault.
True
False
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Profiles

  1. The Empathetic Ex -

    Your answers suggest your ex showed genuine empathy and respect for boundaries, making them unlikely to fit the narcissist profile. Keep this as a reminder that healthy relationships are built on mutual understanding and clear communication.

  2. The Self-Focused Ex -

    In this was my ex a narcissist quiz, you scored moderate on self-interest - your ex could be self-centered at times but lacked deeper manipulative patterns. Tip: stay mindful of your own needs and reinforce boundaries in future connections.

  3. The Charming Manipulator -

    Your results on the is he a narcissist quiz show classic red flags: charisma mixed with subtle control tactics. Quick tip: look back on specific interactions, trust your instincts, and consider support to process these patterns.

  4. The Classic Narcissist -

    This narcissistic partner quiz indicates strong grandiosity, lack of empathy, and repeated manipulation - hallmarks of a narcissistic personality. Call-to-action: seeking professional guidance or counseling can help you heal and rebuild self-esteem.

  5. The Gray-Zone Enigma -

    Your was my ex a narcissist test results were mixed, showing both caring moments and concerning behaviors. Tip: journal your observations, seek feedback from trusted friends, and consider whether patterns outweigh the positives.

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